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Why do medications never have any good side effects?

Boobs are just proof that men can focus on two things at once.

I wanted to get it for you, but then I realized it's my own reflection!

The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.

If I’m with a man, is that going to prevent me from achieving my goal?

If only God can judge us, then Santa has some explaining to do.